Friday, Feb. 19

Fridays are always good days and although today wasn't easy, it was so amazingly good.

I went into school about 6:30 and started catching up on everything. I don't usually see students on Fridays so I have time to do paper/file work, test students and prep for whatever is coming up.

I was working away when the Social Worker (Jan) from the VA called and we talked for a looonnngg time about what Dan is going to need and HOW to pay for it. Right now, it doesn't look like we'll qualify for much help. Like she said, "It looks like you'll be paying out of pocket" for most of his expenses. Now I know we've been blessed to have all that we have!! But, honestly, we don't have that much!! Not enough to cover what he might need.

After I talked with her, I started crunching numbers to see exactly how "short" we'd be and even a third job won't cover it. It was interesting for me to realize I was starting to panic. I don't usually panic about things. Having 10 kids, I found that you can't afford to panic or you'll lose control of what you can do. But, regardless, I was panicking.

My dear, wonderful friend Clella came by and asked me if I wanted to go to lunch with her today. I knew I needed that time away from my desk and maybe then I could pull myself together, so I said yes. She has been fantastic about being there right when I needed someone. And, she honestly cares about it all. She's had her trials and she knows how to handle things pretty good.

Anyway, we talked at lunch and she helped me work through what was really important and promised to help with all the other things, as well. She's a trained Assistive Technology guru(can't remember what it's called right now - part of the whole panic thing) and has access to helpful programs and people. She made me call my dr. right there at lunch (I was too nervous to eat anything anyway) and make an appointment to visit with her about something to help me stay calm and focused. So, I have a dr. appointment on Monday for me :-)

We didn't even get out of the parking lot before she was on the phone to her friends finding out about home modifications and equipment rentals that we might need to keep Dan at home with us. We don't really even know what he'll need but she wanted to be ready to help with whatever we do need.

You can understand that my nerves were starting to settle down a bit. With help like that, how could it be otherwise.

When I got home, I got out the budget and the checkbook and starting paying the bills. We got paid today from the school and yesterday from the pharmacy, so today was a good day to take care of that. As I wrote out my tithing check, I remembered a couple of years ago when the Spirit told me that if I would pay on my gross, I would be blessed. And that was when I got the job at the Pharmacy. What a comfort it is to know that the Lord will bless us. He already has and He will continue to do so. I honestly don't know how it will come about but tonight I have a more comfortable feel than I did today. Thank you Clella and thank you Heavenly Father!!

Tessha texted me around noon to say that "Dad is sitting up having pudding. He did some physical therapy which included standing. They said his legs are getting stronger" and then again at 4:00 to say, "Dad is having a MRI. I'll let you know when the Neuro comes to go over the test. I understand they are looking for signs of new strokes". She called a little later and said they had taken the catheter out and Dan was walking with help to the bathroom. Those are all good signs!! Thank you Tessha for being my eyes and ears, my heart and soul there with Dad.

I also talked with the Psychiatrist today and he said they were going to take Dan off Lithium and perhaps start Paxil and Depacot. We talked a bit about Dan's past meds and the side effects of them and he said he'd share that with the team before they began anything new. He promised to keep in touch with me - which, I think means that I'm welcome to call him :-)

I'm trying to think of anything else new to share, but either there isn't anything or I just can't think of it. Who knows? I let you know when I find out. :-)
Thanks for the thoughts, prayers and comments. I appreciate them all.